Casualty of War

By Nicky Demirci

 

 

Shots fire in my head

An airplane passes over

Laboured breath, sweaty brow

Not long left of this nightmare, 

Can I wake up now?

 

Camouflage protects me

Body armour deflects some shots

But images inside my head refuse to  be erased

Bold, stark, each blink produces another snap-shot

 

The sounds, the smell, the burning

Screams piercing through my head as another body is pierced

Massacre, carnage, fear, justice, revenge

What is it for and does anyone ever really win?

 

Medal pinned on jacket but wounds left inside

Duty finished, leaving a war-zone to fight a different one

One that is relentless, one that refuses to back down

No six-month tour of duty for me

This is a long one, it's for life

 

I'm the lucky one they say, the one that got away

I don't feel lucky; I carry the aftermath in my head

Dread upon waking and long nights full of vivid dreams

 

I'm a statistic, just a number, a name in the paper

A face upon the screen

I can be many things

A hero, a villain, a killer, a father, a son

Opposing views, differing opinions,

Is this what I signed up for?

I'm just another casualty of war

​

Nicky Demirci 2018